Top Form The Series - Blog Posts

when their love language is speaking through their character's lines to communicate their deepest feelings (*T^T)

Akin and his Disorganized Attachment Style with Jin

(No spoilers from ep9)

If you don't know what a disorganized attachment style is, it is one of the four attachment styles (Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Disorganized), often stems from childhood experiences resulting in inconsistent and unpredictable behaviours in relationships.

People with this style of attachment often find it difficult to trust people, have mixed feelings, and have negative views of others and themselves. They seek closeness and then withdraw to avoid getting hurt.

Akin, the most huggable (or sexiest) man and the winner of so many Best Actor awards comes across as cold and detached at first. But then we see how caring and considerate he is of the people around him (arranges food for the whole crew, helps a newbie with his acting, and even deals kindly with his stalker). He is emotional (the hundred times he cried) and most importantly he is a perfectionist. Even though that helps him in his acting career, he tends to bring the same in his relationship with Jin which worsens their already existing issues. Perfectionists need a certain amount of control over whatever they do and when they cannot have that, they either procrastinate the task or abandon it completely.

Akin suggests breakups whenever he feels like he's at fault because he fails to control the situation.

-> He starts freezing Jin out when he doesn't win the Sexiest Man award and feels even worse about feeling the loss. The breakdown that day was not from jealousy. No- when he couldn't maintain the perfect Actor/Celebrity status he’s expected and worked to be, he broke down. To stop projecting that bitterness onto Jin he acts cold.

-> He wants to break up when Johnny happens and he believes he was at fault. He lost control and there's nothing he can do/be to Jin to make it any better or perfect as before. During ep7 when Jin confesses his love, Akin’s instant response is, “That's why want to break up with you “. Meaning- ‘I did something wrong, I can't be perfect for you so let's end this’.

But he doesn't bring breakup during the whole stalker headache. He knows he's not completely at fault (he says the same thing in ep8) and knows there’s something they could do to control the issue.

-> He wants to break up again (not spoiling for those who didn't watch ep9, but you're going to see a lot of Akin’s need for control there). He's losing control, he cannot ensure the perfect love life for Jin if things continue this way.

But what does Jin want?

Jin only wants Akin. He wants to be there, good or bad. He doesn't care for awards or titles. He’d praise his boyfriend openly, even when he's the winner, consequences and ego be damned, and wants to share every happiness with him.

-> He throws himself out of the car immediately when Akin storms out in distress in ep5. He doesn't hesitate a second to run behind his man, lets Akin cry and gather his thoughts by himself and then kisses him to apologize for not understanding him.

-> Even though he leaves Akin alone in the parking lot after the Johnny thing, he goes to watch Akin’s play, when he himself said he wouldn't chase Akin anymore. He's not ready to abandon their relationship and goes to investigate the truth of it. Again there's no hesitancy in Jin to apologize for leaving Akin alone and not be with him that day.

Now Jin is not perfect, none of us are, but he is perfect for Akin’s disorganized attachment style.

Often people with this type of attachment are the first to initiate breakup as a means to control the situation. But do they really want a breakup in the first place? No. Underneath all the pain, and fear of abandonment they need someone to fight for them and be with them even when they are not perfect.

(None of the GIFs and images are mine. All credit to the creators)

a Kat 🐈 rambles post

I apparently have a lot to say about Top Form, but in respect for the limited time I have, I'm here to say:

Jin's redemption is in giving Akin what he needed - even if it wasn't what I, as the audience, wanted.

Discussion of Top Form episode 6 and 7 under the cut. TW for discussion of SA.

I have a whole unwritten post in my head about The Nightmare Jin / Akin Heart Rending Fest at the end of episode 6, and how Jin, who has been a magical unicorn of giving Akin what he needs all along, failed Akin.

I have A LOT of feelings. I wanted groveling. I wanted to see Jin feeling all the shock and horror of understanding what he did. Of how he stomped on Akin in his moment of greatest vulnerability, of how broken and wounded Akin was in the garage, and how Jin - the one person Akin NEEDED to love him and hold him and comfort him - shattered what was left of Akin. I wanted epic level groveling and amends making. I wanted Jin to metaphorically rip his own heart out of his chest and lay it at Akin's feet. After the opening of episode 7 I wanted blood to run in the streets for that man. I was ready to go vengeance demon for Akin.

But what I wanted, is the exact opposite of what Akin needed.

Jin's biggest failure in the series was how he got so caught up in his own feelings in episode 6, that he couldn't SEE Akin and therefor wasn't able to give Akin what he needed. In episode 7, he could have repeated that mistake. I do think Jin was remorseful. I think he -WOULD- have groveled, and would have spent the rest of his life trying to make it up to Akin. I think he would have delivered Johnny's (metaphorical) head on a platter. I think he would have burned down the theater and his career and raged in defense of Akin. That man has shown us, and Akin, repeatedly that he is in it for the long haul.

There is a great irony in that as much as I wanted a bigger and better apology, I think that Jin apologizing in that way would have been another way to fail Akin. Because the big apology would have been about Jin's feelings, about making himself feel better. But I think his true was redemption is that he was able to step out of his own feelings, and once again see Akin and what Akin needed.

Jin apologized, but Akin didn't want it and couldn't tolerate it. Akin didn't need Johnny's head. Akin didn't need Jin to set the world on fire in anger and vengeance. Akin didn't need an apology. It causes me great pain that despite all MY anger and rage, that Akin wasn't angry. Akin didn't blame Jin. Akin wasn't mad. Akin was heartbroken. Akin blamed himself. Akin was full of shame.

Jin gave Akin everything he needed. Jin gave Akin his body back- by giving him the knowledge that he had not been violated in the way he feared most.* Jin gave Akin his innocence back- by giving him the knowledge that he hadn't done anything wrong. Jin gave Akin his heart back - by giving him the knowledge that he was loved and cherished.

Hello!!

As I am desperately absorbing any speck of Top Form content before the new episode tomorrow, I’d love to hear your thoughts on how Akin and Jin might possibly resolve their current rift/misunderstanding/situation. I have not seen the original anime, but I’m cautiously optimistic for how the live adaptation will handle this. (I desperately need at least one solid interaction where Akin has an understanding and compassionate audience)

I’ve found that I tend to fixate on moments in shows where characters encounter misunderstandings or friction, as the various paths to resolution fascinate me.

Anyway! Apologies for the long ask ♥️

Oh, we're so close to the next episode!

And I do think they could resolve this very well, though I cannot say that I trust the show to do that. But I do trust the show more than the fanbase at this point? Maybe?

I mean, all it takes is Akin telling Jin that he didn't consent to whatever happened and Jin believing him. It takes Jin calming down, realizing he needed to hear Akin out and then listening when Akin speaks to him. That's all it would take!

Will we get that? Ehhhhhhh. EHHHHHHHH.

I want to believe.

I want to be so, so hopeful and to see them resolve this like the 2025 show they are and have it be made clear that Jin reacted poorly and that Akin isn't to blame and that once they talk they can understand each other and be happier and then the Jin claiming Akin scene can be beautiful. Because that scene being about Jin and Akin, together, reclaiming Akin's body? Could be gorgeous. Could be everything.

I do not guarantee this.

I have also not seen the original but it sounds like this problem and dynamic might have been changed for this specific remake as well so how it could be handled and solved is up in the air.

Anyway.

I really, really hope the show sees that Akin doesn't deserve any of the blame and only deserves to be loved and comforted and held and chosen and lets Jin do all of that.

But I worry that societal pressure is going to say that Akin shouldn't have been drinking and that he's going to apologize to Jin and then Jin is going to reclaim him in a way that just... won't feel satisfactory.

I always, sincerely, worry when a show tries to solve a conflict with sex. But the honey scene was well done and well layered so hopefully they can continue that into this and not fall into victim blaming. They changed the original encounter with Jin and Akin so... fingers crossed.

But I do worry about this. This would not be the first show to ruin itself for me by deciding that this kind of assault just Didn't Matter if the two people are gonna fall in love later.