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Incorrect 911 Quotes - Blog Posts

1 month ago

Buck: Do we know exactly how Bobby survived?

Chim: Yeah because we were infected at the same time, and he was fine for most of it?

Hen: His golden blood kept him safe. And even though it was a super strain, changing the way the disease spreads diminished its lethality.

Ravi: So it wasn't airborne after all?

Eddie: I was wondering about that. The regular CCHF spreads through insect bites or contact with fluids of another infected human.

Hen: Yeah, the super strain tried to change that and made it more unstable in the process.

Buck: Hence Cap's zombie routine.

Chim: Well, thank God for Cap's resurrection powers.

Eddie: I guess Cap has his Halloween costume locked in now.


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1 year ago

Chris, who came up with the best prank ever: 😈

Eddie: Your son is out of control. Buck: M-my son? I can barely stop getting flustered when you call Chris 'our' son, why are you calling him just mine all of a sudden?! Eddie: Because he's dating five different girls and you need to talk him out of it. Now. Buck, blinking rapidly: ...Yeah, alright. I can see how that is my problem. Five though? Eddie: It better not be six.


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1 year ago

This is just funny

Bobby, calmly: Hello, Eddie. how long have you been sleeping with Buck?

Eddie, startled: What!?

Bobby, still calm: How long have you been sleeping with Buck?

Eddie, panicking: That's disgusting. And wrong. I don't even get-

Eddie, still panicking: Why would- I- I've never had sex with anyone anywhere. It's none of your- you- you have. The nerve. The audacity.

Eddie, trying to cover: Buck is my co-parent. Technically. And he is terrible face-wise. And how- how do I know, frankly, that you're not sleeping with him?

Eddie, trying to act calm: Maybe you are. Maybe you're trying to throw me off. Hmm? Check and mate.

Bobby:

Eddie, shouting: This is an outrage! Who do I call?!


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3 years ago

Eddie: A theif.

Buck: Thief?

Eddie: Theif.

Buck: I before E, except after C.

Buck: Thceif.

Eddie: No.


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3 years ago

Buck: Look. I may not be a saint, but it's not like I’ve killed anybody. I’m not an arsonist. I’ve never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out of state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground.

Eddie: Okay, that's really specific, and that makes me think that you definitely did do that.


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3 years ago

Bobby, going over Buck's resume: Okay, so right here, it states that you’re creative.

Buck: Yes

Bobby: Okay... may I know what you create?

Buck: Problems.


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1 month ago

*Buck and Eddie during another Facetime call*

Buck: Hey, are you ok? Why are you crying?

Eddie: I'm fine Buck, this is clearly just an allergic reaction.

Buck: To what exactly?

Eddie: Life in Texas.


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10 months ago

INCORRECT 9-1-1 QUOTE

----

Eddie: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Tommy recently.

Buck: No, Eddie, it's not what it looks like, I swear.

Eddie: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

Buck: No! You’re the only one for me.

Eddie: Is that so?

Buck: I promise! Tommy and I are just dating, okay? He's my boyfriend.

Eddie: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Buck: You are still my one and only best friend! He's just the love of my life, nothing more!

Eddie: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Buck: Of course bro!

Eddie: Bro...

Tommy: What the-

----

• fandom: 9-1-1


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10 months ago

Eddie: I did not summon a demon. Buck: Are you sure? Cause it says here in my contract that I'm supposed to be bound to you. Eddie: And what is that supposed to entail? Buck: Well, it's a bit like marriage - Eddie: Do you want my blood? My soul? I can give you anything except for my son. Buck, taken aback: Uh, well actually, I would be bound by my contract to protect your son - Eddie: Deal. Where do I sign, future Mr Diaz?


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Tommy, Owen, and Grace: *spinning calmly in the teacups*

Judd, Carlos, Paul, and Nancy: *spinning a bit faster and arguing about what show is better*

Mateo, TK, Marjan, and Wyatt: *spinning at the speed of sound and screaming*


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