So.. I tried to off myself last week and ended up in the icu.
Rainer Maria Rilke, Rilke’s Book of Hours
I found these workouts a while ago and omg they are the best but the arm workout isn’t for the faint of heart it burns
https://youtu.be/UyTR2EjTAXU
https://youtu.be/R2E3X9L3Iu4
They both take at least 4 days till you can see results but stick to them and you can lose and tone so much.
Love you 💞
Okay so I just binged on kfc and a donut, it was 546 cals for the tenders and 300 cals for the donut. I’m literally so dead and want to kms. I purged it but still feel like absolute shit with a total of 1107 calories in total today.
I need to die, I am sick of this cycle.
got on the scale at the doc & i finally broke out of being 135lbs.
ya’ll i’m 126lbs😭🥺
so since i’m an actual witch, this post is gonna be a plateau breaking spell ✨✨✨
stay safe everyone!!!!
Stats - Active 7/22
I DO NOT ENCOURAGE STARVING, PURGING, PROANA OR ANYTHING THIS IS A COPING TOOL
GW1 ~ 80kg/176lbs -🔓New shirt
78kg/171lbs -🔓
74kg/163lbs -🔓
GW2 ~70kg/154lbs - 🔓Waist beads
68kg/150lbs - 🔓
GW3 ~ 65kg/143lbs - 🔒Brandname pants
62kg/136lbs - 🔒
58kg/127lbs - 🔒
UGW~ 55kg/120lbs - 🔒Dunno yet
A little about me
Ive had an Ed since I was 8 unfortunately and it went from BED to ANA with b/p subtype since then
I fast as long as I can as eating nothing is easier than eating a little, the longest being 127 hours (6 days). Whenever I eat something I purge it regardless of it being a binge or not, I’ve been trying not to but it’s really hard to sit with the feeling.
Feel free to bully me with meanspo, sweetspo and whatever
-your lowest weight is other peoples highest.
-people never noticing that you don’t eat due to your weight.
-ACTUALLY being medically fat, not just feeling fat.
-having legitimate problems working out (knees can’t handle all the weight, asthma, etc)
-”you probably shouldn’t eat that, should you?” when taking your first bite of a remotely unhealthy food in MONTHS.
-losing over 70lbs and still not be close to ‘thin’.
-thinner anas looking down on you because you’re not skinny enough. (actually happened)
-thinner anas telling you to ‘stop starving yourself’ or ‘turn back before you get sick’ when you’ve actually been doing this longer than them.
-MORE SIDE EFFECTS!
-being petty and offended when people half your size call themselves fat in front of you, well knowing you weigh twice as much as them. (this is a personal problem but still)
-actually being happy to be at a NORMAL weight for once.
-”MY BMI IS FINALLY UNDER 25!”
-lower chances of actually hitting your ugw because your body literally can’t lose more.
-LOOSE SKIN. L O T S OF IT.
-knowing you’ve lost more than most of the fellow anas, but not being able to talk about it because your cw isn’t low enough just yet.
so shoutout to all the bigger people with anorexic tendencies, because they deserve way more. because they’ve gone through this pain for so long without enough recognition. because within the ana community, they’re often not even acknowledged. because THEY ARE VALID TOO.
i started at over 250lbs and hit my first plateau at 149, so i do have a right to complain, thank you very much. (i’m just over 5′4. just imagine.)
I want to look as sick as my thoughts
Reblog shit for myself, just blockSW:85kg CW:74.7kg GW:70kg UGW:55kg
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